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"I made out with a homeless guy by accident. I had no idea -- he was really tan, he had no shoes on. I just thought it was, like, his thang, you know? I was like, 'He's probably in a band."

— Amy Schumer
amy schumer Quotes Band,Homeless,No Idea

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I don't know what it would be like to actually play guitar. I've toured with a lot of comedians and it's never been like it is for a rock band.

— Eugene Mirman

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Women do it all the time to look younger and it would make perfect sense if one of them ever came out looking younger - but they don't. They just look the same; they all get plastic surgery face. No matter who they look like going in, they all come out looking like the girl from the band on 'The Muppet Show.

— Dana Gould

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