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— Anthony Burgess"We only need to wear shoes because the British built roads which hurt our feet."
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British Prime Minister William Ewart Gladstone spent his declining years trying to guess the answer to the Irish Question; unfortunately, whenever he was getting warm, the Irish secretly changed the Question.
— W. C. Sellar
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Everything went smoothly at the sailing events today, except for the British team. They forgot to bring limes and they all got scurvy.
— Craig Ferguson
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