"Look, I'm an immigrant, so I know what it is like to dream about coming to America and then to get here and be able to make your dreams a reality, ... Of course, there are millions of people who want to come here. Let's help them, let's find a legal way t"

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Which is why I'd like to tip off law enforcement to an even larger child-abusing religious cult. Its leader also has a compound, and this guy not only operates outside the bounds of the law, but he used to be a Nazi and he wears funny hats. That's right, the Pope is coming to America this week and ladies, he's single!

— Bill Maher