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— Billy Graham"If people are kicking you in the behind, at least you're in front of them."
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When from behind me, a young woman of 25 uttered the following, it was the dumbest thing I have ever heard in my life until Dan Quayle was elected Vice President of the United States. She said, if it weren't for my horse, I wouldn't have spent that year in college.
— Lewis Black
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It's torturous what my siblings put me through. I can take any Olympic final, I can fight in a world championship and fall behind and win in sudden death, but when it comes to my siblings, it's out of my control. There's not much I can do.
— Steven Lopez
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