"I'm not the new kid on the block anymore. Writers always use the phrase "aging rocker," and I'm like, "What other option do I have?" You're either aging or you're dead."

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My father, never chooses me for anything. Unless he needs a human shield. Thirty years and all I am to him is a hunk of meat to block buck shot. Told you dad needed me. Who's the best man now?

— Christopher Titus