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"That's not news! When a shark comes out of the water, walks into a 7-11, and bites you in the ass, then it's news!"

— Carlos Mencia
carlos mencia Quotes Bites,Sharks

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The modern media environment is so overrun with bullshit and static and people trying to sell you stupid crap. It makes you want to bite yourself.

— Brad Listi

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I'm not going to lie: There are times I play mind tricks on myself, like that the french fries are poison. With desserts, I'll let myself have just one bite, but I'll look like a freak when I'm eating it, like when I did Duncan Hines commercials as a kid, just savoring every morsel.

— Fergie

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