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— Craig Ferguson"Donald Trump showed his birth certificate to reporters. Who cares about his birth certificate? I want to know if that thing on his head has had its vaccinations."
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Also she signed away the right to self-destruct years ago. The fine print on the birth certificate, her friends call it.
— Jenny Offill
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My stepmother sold my birth certificate and someone asked why I didn't buy it back. I don't know, really. I just couldn't bring myself to do it. It was mine. It cost me nothing and suddenly I had to buy it back.
— Paul McCartney
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