"If an optimist had his left arm chewed off by an alligator, he might say in a pleasant and hopeful voice, "Well this isn't too bad, I don't have a left arm anymore but at least nobody will ever ask me if I'm left-handed or right-handed," but most of us would say something more along the lines of, "Aaaaaa! My arm! My arm!""

Next Quote

First time I saw an alligator gar I damn near threw up. They ain't natural anything get that big. It's ten feet long and three feet at the girth. Not one of God's creations like you and meSome say they ain't afraid of alligator gar fish. Bullshit. You look at that thing. It's big and mean. Swallow both of us. Them people say they ain't afraid tellin' lies.

— Bukka White