"One day it was about getting married that mother talked with me, and I said I was so glad that when you didn't like being married, or got tired of your husband, you could get Unmarried."

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I've actually become much, much dumber through being married and having these children. I find that I'm not half as sharp that I once was. I can't even help them with their 4th and 5th grade vocabulary and math work at this point.

— Patrick Warburton