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— Ellen DeGeneres"Everybody always resolves to start exercising, but they never do. You know why ? Because it's January. Who wants to go jogging in the freezing cold ?"
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How is it that there are not many who are led by sermons to forsake open sin? Do you know what I think? That is because preachers have too much worldly wisdom.
— Teresa of Avila
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You know we armed Iraq. I wondered about that too, you know during the Persian Gulf war those intelligence reports would come out: "Iraq: incredible weapons - incredible weapons." How do you know that? "Uh, well... we looked at the receipts."
— Bill Hicks
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