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— Garry Shandling"Women need to know that not all guys are going to hurt them the way that the guy did before they started dating me. I know guys I wouldn't go out with."
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Flustered, she replied, "You're not my - my - grandmother, or something." "You'd talk about this with your grandmother? I can't possibly imagine discussing my dating life with mine. She's a lovely woman, I suppose. If you like them bald and racist.
— Maggie Stiefvater
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I was dating a transvestite, and my mother said, "Marry him, you'll double your wardrobe."
— Joan Rivers
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