"The Jewish people, for their tiny numbers, have done superbly. They don't need me. They have Einstein. They have everybody - Maury Povich."

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I was watching Maury Povich the other day. He had these people on who say that they've had near death experiences. Do you ever notice they always say the same thing? 'I remember seeing this really bright, white light.' It's like, of course, you pinhead, it's the paramedic looking in your pupils with a penlight.

— Carol Leifer