"My daughter is the biggest gift; I've said it so many times and it sounds like a cliche, but the thing about being a parent is when you think you've cracked it, and you're on top of your game, they change again and you have to catch up and adjust. I feel such a responsibility to instill good values in her, to be polite, to have discipline."

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When I was 13 I told my dad I'd rather kill myself than do an ordinary job. He vaguely muttered something about how I'd need to earn a living somehow, but he's been totally behind me, forking out money he didn't really have to send me to university. Every other comedian I've met had to fight their parents to be allowed to do this but mine have been brilliant.

— Noel Fielding