"Some high society lady said is your horse outside? No ma'am, he's between my legs, but your too fat to ride."

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I kind of feel like I've been eating professionally for a long time. I've tasted everything. If there's a sausage, you know what? I know exactly what it tastes like. I love them all. But right now it's more important for me to not have all that grease and fat in my body.

— Duff Goldman