"New Year's resolution: To refrain from saying witty, unkind things, unless they are really witty and irreparably damaging."

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You make New Year's resolutions. And you make them into the teeth of old resolutions which were different. Then you don't keep your new resolutions and you tell yourself you are weak-willed. You aren't weak-willed, you are simply obeying yourself as of yesterday.

— L. Ron Hubbard