"Felting Phil (taking all of his chips down to the felt on the table). I loved beating him and then hed go over to the couch and sulk, staring at the ceiling."

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If some glorious angel suddenly descended through my living room ceiling and offered to take away the children I have and give me other, better children — more polite, funnier, nicer, smarter — I would cling to the children I have and pray away that atrocious spectacle.

— Andrew Solomon