"There is no definitive guidebook on how to pick the right partner, and even if there were, I'm way too dumb to write it."

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There's more to life than being an actor in a Hollywood movie. I'm not going to adapt my life after that existence, where a lot of people do. And they get the publicist, and they get all that stuff, and it becomes them. I think it's a stupid way to live your life. A really dumb way to live your life.

— Zach Galifianakis