"Any writer knows that what's left out is as essential, if not more so, than what's there. Unlearning works that way."

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I do know that some people believe that I see gender as a "choice" rather than as an essential and firmly fixed sense of self. My view is actually not that. No matter whether one feels one's gendered and sexed reality to be firmly fixed or less so, every person should have the right to determine the legal and linguistic terms of their embodied lives.

— Judith Butler