"In general, the bigger a mountain the older it is. The biggest mountains were built before any others, because when they were built there was incomparably more flammable material within the Earth. Over the many thousands of years that have passed, the quantity of flammable material has doubtless decreased."

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Marriage vows in an objectivist church would probably run along the lines of "Do you promise to attempt to dominate and subdue this woman until such time as you grow bored?" "Maybe." "Close enough. And do you promise to applaud this man`s production until such time as you find someone with a bigger ... corporation?" "Whatever." "By the power vested in me by having scammed you guys out of a marriage license fee, I now pronounce you man and appendage. May you be unencumbered by small persons."

— Robert Slade