"I was in a department store and I saw a weird-looking gadget. I asked the young saleslady what it was. She answered, "It doesn't do anything. It's just a Christmas gift.""

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Well Stephanie, I'd like to thank you for giving me such a kind Christmas gift, but unfortunately I didn't get you any gifts. But then again, what can you get for the girl whose had everyone?

— Chris Jericho