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— Milton Berle"Valentine's Day - a nice holiday because it's the first day of the rest of your wife."

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The day Elvis passed away would be our national holiday, if the South would have won, we'd had it made.
— Hank Williams, Jr.
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The only way to go on holiday is with your expectations at ground level. Convince yourself before you go that the weather's going to be dreadful and there will be nylon sheets. You'll then be pleasantly surprised.
— Jenny Eclair
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