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— Sarah Silverman"The good news is hopeful doesn't mean dumb. The bad news is cynical doesn't mean smart."
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More bad news for the Taliban. Remember how they are promised 72 virgins when they die? Turns out that it's only one 72-year-old virgin.
— Jay Leno
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When you're expecting bad news you have to be prepared for it a long time ahead so that when the telegram comes you can already pronounce the syllables in your mouth before opening it.
— Robert Pinget
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