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— Seth Roberts"Whatever your (unfavorable) situation is, it is a good idea to ask yourself "WHAT YOU WOULD DO if you were free of it." An alcoholic's wife might wish her husband would stop drinking...On examination of her beliefs, she may discover she was frightened of not achieving her own goals and actually encouraged the alcoholism so she would not have to face her own failure."
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[Smoking is] a dirty habit that should be banned from America by the Government, instead of moderate alcoholic drinking.
— Auguste Piccard
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Scientists have invented a new strain of cannabis without the high. They celebrated with non-alcoholic beer and furious dry-humping.
— Stephen Colbert
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