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— Stephen Fry"This new England we have invented for ourselves is not interested at all in education. It is only interested in training, both material and spiritual. Education means freedom, it means ideas, it means truth. Training is what you do to a pear tree when you pleach it and prune it to grow against a wall. Training is what you give an airline pilot or a computer operator or a barrister or a radio producer. Education is what you give children to enable them to be free from the prejudices and moral bankruptcies of their elders."
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What a waste of an education Rick Santorum is! ... Let's just pray that none of his home-schooled kids grow up to be an airline pilot, okay? That's all I'm asking. Please dear God, do not let any of these home-schooled kids grow up to be a surgeon, an airline pilot, or a nurse. Or somebody that's in charge of my trans-vaginal mandatory ultrasound. Seriously, no science-y things for them, you know, just religion, let them be all preachers or something.
— Randi Rhodes
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I used to be an airline pilot. I got fired because I kept locking the keys in the plane. They caught me on an 80 foot stepladder with a coat hanger.
— Steven Wright
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