"I don't go to see movies to see plots. I'm not interested in puzzles like an Agatha Christie story."

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According to a new report, since he's been governor, Chris Christie has spent $82,000 at a concession stand at MetLife Stadium. Now, I know it seems like the perfect story for a Chris Christie joke but I'm actually on a Chris Christie joke diet. So nothing for me, thanks.

— Jimmy Fallon