"In Ohio seasons are theatrical. Each one enters like a prima donna, convinced its performance is the reason the world has people in it."

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... I tried to end our little duel. I called out pacifying words; I entreated; I finally surrendered. Still Clyde came, my pirate costume so great a success that it had apparently convinced him that we were back in the golden days of romantic old New Orleans when gentlemen decided matters of hot dog honor at twenty paces

— John Kennedy Toole