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"I bet after seeing us, George Washington would sue us for calling him 'father.'"

— Will Rogers
will rogers Quotes Seeing,America,Calling

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I read in the newspapers they are going to have 30 minutes of intellectual stuff on television every Monday from 7:30 to 8. to educate America. They couldn't educate America if they started at 6:30.

— Groucho Marx

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America is a large friendly dog in a small room. Every time it wags its tail it knocks over a chair.

— Arnold J. Toynbee

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