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"You want to know what it's like to be on a plane for 22 hours? Sit in a chair, squeeze your head as hard as you can, don't stop, then take a paper bag and put it over your mouth and nose and breath your own air over and over and over."

— Lewis Black
lewis black Quotes Funny Travel,Bags,Noses

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Lewis Black
Funny Travel
Bags
Noses
Chairs
Planes
Over You
Breaths
Air Travel
Paper Bags

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People come back from flights and tell you a story like it's a horror story. That's how bad they make it sound. They're like, 'It was the worst day of my life. We didn't board for 20 minutes and they made us sit there on the runway for 40 minutes.' Oh really? What happened next? Did you fly in the air, incredibly, like a bird? Did you partake in the miracle of human flight you non-contributing zero?'

— Louis C. K.

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Our kids haven't any airs about them. I don't like posh kids who don't like dirty dolls or expect a chauffeur every time they go out.

— Linda McCartney

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