"A body without wine is like a dessert without sugar. A pale woman can only be coloured with lipstick and rouge, and a pale man can only be coloured with wine!"

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Between "just desserts" and "tragic irony" we are given quite a lot of scope for our particular talent. Generally speaking, things have gone about as far as they can possibly go when things have got about as bad as they reasonably get.

— Tom Stoppard