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— David Letterman"Rick Perry is now saying he thinks that Barack Obama's birth certificate is fake. I think Perry may have faked his driver's license."
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I'm rather relaxed about death. From quite an early age I've regarded it as part of the deal, the unwritten guarantee that comes with your birth certificate.
— Bob Monkhouse
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President Obama and his wife are going to Kenya. Donald Trump said, 'While you're there, pick up your birth certificate.'
— David Letterman
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