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— Ray Romano"When you wake up one day and say, "You know what? I don't think I ever need to sleep or have sex again." Congratulations, you're ready (to have children)."
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I think I'm going to give my baby her first food on Thanksgiving, make her some organic sweet potato. I'm very excited! It's going to be a big day and my husband is in charge of the turkey - he's the chef of the family!
— Lily Aldridge
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I think my friends wife has been banging a black guy. Because they just had a baby. And the baby had a hole in it.
— Anthony Jeselnik
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