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Act your age, not your shoe size.
Sep 10, 2025
People ask me what I'd most appreciate getting for my eighty-seventh birthday. I tell them, a paternity suit.
If you want to look young and thin on your birthday. Hang around a bunch of old fat people.
You're birthday reminds me of the old Chinese scholar..... Yung No Mo
Some people try to turn back their odometers. Not me, I want people to know “why” I look this way. I’ve traveled a long way and some of the roads weren’t paved.
You're only as old as you feel.
If you're not getting older, you're dead.
I remember when the candle shop burned down. Everyone stood around singing 'Happy Birthday.'
When I was born I was so surprised I didn't talk for a year and a half.
A friend never defends a husband who gets his wife an electric skillet for her birthday.
The older we get, the fewer things seem worth waiting in line for.
One should never trust a woman who tells one her real age. A woman who would tell one that would tell one anything.
As you get older three things happen. The first is your memory goes, and I can't remember the other two.
The best way to remember your wife's birthday is to forget it once.
The greatest gift that you can give to others is the gift of unconditional love and acceptance.
May you live all the days of your life.
With mirth and laughter let old wrinkles come.
The older the fiddler, the sweeter the tune.
Time may be a great healer, but it's a lousy beautician.
Youth is happy because it has the ability to see beauty. Anyone who keeps the ability to see beauty never grows old.
Some turn to vinegar, but the best improve with age.
Men are like wine - some turn to vinegar, but the best improve with age.
Growing old is mandatory; growing up is optional.
The best birthdays of all are those that haven't arrived yet.
If you want to look young and thin, hang around old fat people.
Like many women my age, I am 28 years old.
Age is strictly a case of mind over matter. If you don't mind, it doesn't matter.
There is still no cure for the common birthday.
Age is an issue of mind over matter. If you don't mind, it doesn't matter.
You're only young once, but you can be immature forever.
Every year on your birthday, you get a chance to start new.
It is lovely, when I forget all birthdays, including my own, to find that somebody remembers me.
A diplomat is a man who always remembers a woman's birthday but never remembers her age.
The years between fifty and seventy are the hardest. You are always being asked to do things, and yet you are not decrepit enough to turn them down.
Time and tide wait for no man.
Time and tide wait for no man, but time always stands still for a woman of 30.
You know you're getting old when the candles cost more than the cake.
Nature gives you the face you have at twenty; it is up to you to merit the face you have at fifty.
May you live to be 100 and may the last voice you hear be mine.
Our birthdays are feathers in the broad wing of time.
The secret of staying young is to live honestly, eat slowly, and lie about your age.
The more you praise and celebrate your life, the more there is in life to celebrate.
All the world is birthday cake, so take a piece, but not too much.
In the end, it's not the years in your life that count. It's the life in your years.
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