Hilarious Sports Quotes

I spent 90% of my money on women and drink. The rest I wasted

To win, I'd run over Joe's mom too.

The only thing that keeps this organization from being recognized as one of the finest in baseball is wins and losses at the major league level.

I don't want to shoot my mouth in my foot, but those are games we can win.

I want your heart, I want to eat your children.

He's one of the best power forwards of all-time. I take my hands off to him.

Therapy can be a good thing; it can be therapeutic.

I don't think there's anybody in this organization not focused on the 49ers...I mean Chargers.

That's great, tell him he's Pele and get him back on.

When you're rich, you don't write checks. Straight cash, homey.

I'd run over my own mother to win the Super Bowl.

All hockey players are bilingual. They know English and profanity.

Any time Detroit scores more than 100 points and holds the other team below 100 points they almost always win.

Chemistry is a class you take in high school or college, where you figure out two plus two is 10, or something.

Ray Lewis is the type of guy, if he were in a fight with a bear I wouldn't help him, I'd pour honey on him because he likes to fight. That's the type of guy Ray Lewis is.

Son, looks to me like you're spending too much time on one subject.

These are my new shoes. They're good shoes. They won't make you rich like me, they won't make you rebound like me, they definitely won't make you handsome like me. They'll only make you have shoes like me. That's it.

I led the league in go get 'em next time.

My sister's expecting a baby, and I don't know if I'm going to be an uncle or an aunt.

But the real tragedy was that 15 hadn't been colored yet.

Don't say I don't get along with my teammates. I just don't get along with some of the guys on the team.

Hockey is a sport for white men. Basketball is a sport for black men. Golf is a sport for white men dressed like black pimps.

When you get that nice celebration coming into the dugout and you're getting your ass hammered by guys, there's no better feeling than to have that done.

I may be dumb, but I'm not stupid.

Most football players are temperamental. That's 90 percent temper and 10 percent mental.

I feel like I'm the best, but you're not going to get me to say that.

I owe a lot to my parents, especially by mother and my father.

You guys line up alphabetically by height.

Nobody in football should be called a genius. A genius is a guy like Norman Einstein.

If history repeats itself, I should think we can expect the same thing again.