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Half our life is spent trying to find something to do with the time we have rushed through life trying to save.
Sep 10, 2025
Retirement is like a long vacation in Las Vegas. The goal is to enjoy it to the fullest, but not so fully that you run out of money.
There's one thing I always wanted to do before I quit... Retire!
When some people retire, it's going to be mighty hard to be able to tell the difference.
When a man retires, his wife gets twice the husband but only half the income.
Gainfully unemployed, very proud of it, too.
Retirement means no pressure, no stress, no heartache... unless you play golf.
God has a plan for your retirement.
In retirement, only money and symptoms are consequential.
In my retirement I go for a short swim at least once or twice every day. It's either that or buy a new golf ball.
Retirement at sixty-five is ridiculous. When I was sixty-five I still had pimples.
I enjoy waking up and not having to go to work. So I do it three or four times a day.
A retired husband is often a wife's full-time job.
I always arrive late at the office, but I make up for it by leaving early.
As in all successful ventures, the foundation of a good retirement is planning.
The trouble with retirement is that you never get a day off.
When a man retires and time is no longer a matter of urgent importance, his colleagues generally present him with a watch.
When one door closes, another one opens.
A man can't retire his experience.
Retirement: It's nice to get out of the rat race, but you have to learn to get along with less cheese.
Forever, and forever, farewell, Cassius! If we do meet again, why, we shall smile; If not, why then this parting was well made.
I'm now as free as the breeze - with roughly the same income.
The question isn't at what age I want to retire, it's at what income.
When I retire I'm going to spend my evenings by the fireplace going through those boxes. There are things in there that ought to be burned.
When you retire, you switch bosses - from the one who hired you to the one who married you.
There's an enormous number of managers who have retired on the job.
Retired is being tired twice, I've thought, first tired of working, then tired of not.
Few men of action have been able to make a graceful exit at the appropriate time.
In this country men seem to live for action as long as they can and sink into apathy when they retire.
If people concentrated on the really important things in life, there'd be a shortage of fishing poles.
The harder you work, the harder it is to surrender.
If you drink don't drive. Don't even putt.
You know you're getting old when work is a lot less fun and fun is a lot more work.
You know you're getting old when you stoop to tie your shoelaces and wonder what else you could do while you're down there.
Retire? I'm going to stay in show business until I'm the only one left
Middle age is when work is a lot less fun and fun is a lot more work.
At age 20, we worry about what others think of us. At age 40, we don't care what they think of us. At age 60, we discover they haven't been thinking of us at all.
Preparation for old age should begin not later than one's teens. A life which is empty of purpose until 65 will not suddenly become filled on retirement.
I think retirement beats the heck out of life after death, that's for sure.
Age is only a number, a cipher for the records. A man can't retire his experience. He must use it. Experience achieves more with less energy and time.
You're only young once, but you can be immature forever.
The secret of staying young is to live honestly, eat slowly, and lie about your age.
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