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I require only three things of a man. He must be handsome, ruthless and stupid.
Sep 10, 2025
Valentine's Day: the holiday that reminds you that if you don't have a special someone, you're alone.
Love has the power of making you believe what you would normally treat with the deepest suspicion.
One should always be in love. That is the reason one should never marry.
Always get married in the morning. That way if it doesn't work out, you haven't wasted the whole day.
No matter how lovesick a woman is, she shouldn't take the first pill that comes along!
Today is February 14th - St. Valentine's day. Women call it Love day, while men name it as Extortion day.
Women are cursed, and men are the proof.
Men have died from time to time, and worms have eaten them, but not for love.
My boyfriend and I broke up. He wanted to get married and I didn't want him to.
Like I've always said, love wouldn't be blind if the braille weren't so damned much fun.
I wonder what fool it was that first invented kissing.
The poor wish to be rich, the rich wish to be happy, the single wish to be married, and the married wish to be dead.
Oh, if it be to choose and call thee mine, love, thou art every day my Valentine!
Kisses are a better fate than wisdom.
Love is a game that two can play and both win.
Valentine's Day money-saving tip: Break up on February 13th, get back together on the 15th.
Love is much nicer to be in than an automobile accident, a tight girdle, a higher tax bracket or a holding pattern over Philadelphia.
You cannot be with someone just because you don’t want to hurt him. You have your own happiness to think about.
Happy Valentine's Day! And if this is news to you, my guess is you're probably alone. Valentine's Day is often times a, well, it's a manufactured day that really doesn't mean anything.
You're not a coward just because you don't want to hurt people.
Some people are settling down, some people are settling and some people refuse to settle for anything less than butterflies.
Love is like war; easy to begin, hard to end.
If love means never having to say you're sorry, then marriage means always having to say everything twice.
To fall in love is awfully simple, but to fall out of love is simply awful.
Being single used to mean that nobody wanted you. Now it means you're pretty sexy and you're taking your time deciding how you want your life to be and who you want to spend it with.
I'm single because I was born that way.
Love is an exploding cigar we willingly smoke.
Hearts will never be practical until they can be made unbreakable.
Being single is pretty good. It's a nice sense of irresponsibility.
Today is Valentine's Day - or, as men like to call it, Extortion Day!
Behind every successful man is a woman, behind her is his wife.
No one will ever win the battle of the sexes; there's too much fraternizing with the enemy.
If love is blind, why is lingerie so popular?
Love sucks. Sometimes it feels good. Sometimes it's just another way to bleed.
True love comes quietly, without banners or flashing lights. If you hear bells, get your ears checked.
What the world really needs is more love and less paper work.
If you have only one smile in you give it to the people you love.
Instead of getting married again, I'm going to find a woman I don't like and give her a house.
At my age an affair of the heart is a bypass!
All you need is love. But a little chocolate now and then doesn't hurt.
Love is only a dirty trick played on us to achieve continuation of the species.
Gravitation is not responsible for people falling in love.
The course of true love never did run smooth.
If you live to be a hundred, I want to live to be a hundred minus one day so I never have to live without you.
Love is composed of a single soul inhabiting two bodies.
Avant-garde means never having to say you're sorry.
Vasectomy means never having to say you're sorry.
For the taxable investor, indexing means never having to say you're sorry.
Being an American means never having to say you're sorry.